Making Imperfect Progress

How is your gratefulness Journey coming? I would love to hear about what you are finding out as we go along through this month of thanksgiving.  How are you doing with remember some of these different kind of things to be thankful for? Is it hard to find just one food to be thankful for? Comment about what you are finding difficult or what your eyes have been open to.

5 days of thankfulness and it hasn’t become too hard yet. I really like this list, because these things are so different from the normal thankfulness lists people usually have.

I love the sound of my children playing nicely together. The sound of squeals and giggles, the sound of my oldest taking charge and leading in different games. I sometimes love to just sit and listen to their conversation, wondering to myself what they feel is important. I love to hear about them building Lego’s together or hear them playing a game of hide and seek even with their little sister. I love hearing little J playing babies or even counting to 10 as she waits for her brothers to hide. Today my gratefulness lists asks us what sound we are thankful for,  I would have to say I am thankful for the sound of my children. Even the times they are running through the halls chasing each other, or the times they are fighting and I have to step in. I love listening to them and figuring out their unique personalities. I love hearing stories from the different perspectives of my kids.  I actually like being in the car with them hearing all of them talking at the same time in excitement.

10 years ago this house was really quiet and it is so crazy to think about how loud it has become over the years. I love many sounds of children, I love chatting with them at night and discovering how their day went from their perspective. I love the sound of my baby cooing and starting to talk to me. I love the sound of the baby cry as they are born and take their first breath. Today I marvel in my children taking in each sound each of them gives off. Little J talking in her sweet voice telling me she loves me or that she wants a hug. W telling me about his day at school and how much he loves handwriting. D hollering down the hall, chasing a brother with a dart gun and screaming attack sounds. C playing quietly, making motor sounds with his loader and tractors. All of these sounds I marvel in and today I am grateful for the loud sounds my children give off.

Today’s thankfulness scripture is Phil 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God.

But I don’t think I can leave it at just this verse because the next verse completes it. Verse 7 And the peace of God which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Oh how I love these verse. It tells me that in every situation I should pray and Gods peace will come upon me. I have experience this so many times. So many times my life has been in a complete upheaval and I didn’t stop praying and God didn’t stop giving me peace. I am not saying that instant peace comes because it did not come right away but there was some kind of power that came within me so I could handle the difficult situation I was facing at the time. The only way I can explain it was the peace and power of God coming upon me so I could get through the rough moments in my life.

Thank you Jesus for the sense of hearing that you have given to me. That I can sit back and listen to my kids giggling together or even wrestling with daddy when he becomes a bucking bull or a wresting opponent. Thank you Lord for bringing peace through those difficult times in my life. That I may trust you more as the times are difficult and even though the not so hard times in my life. Lord help me to present my requests to you with prayer and petition. Thank you Lord for each one of my noisy healthy happy children and even when they are not so happy thank you. In Jesus Name Amen.

Signing off from one woman to another,

Jenny Wren

In America we have access to anything we want or need.  Even if you can’t afford something you can buy it on credit or even pay for it in food stamps . This really can be good or it can be bad. So much of the world doesn’t have as much as Americans do and I think so often we take it for granted.  We become complacent and whine because we have to wait in a long line for the fast food.  Or we complain because we can’t afford those designer boots for our new outfit.  Those are what I like to call rich people problems.  I really have no idea what it’s like to not have a need met. I always have more than enough money to buy the food I need to feed my family.  I have freezers full of food and a fridge that needs cleaned out from the rotting food that we have so much of.

That’s why this next day of thankfulness, I want to use the day to think of food. It asks what food are you most thankful for.  But today I want to marvel in the fact that I have food to lift to my mouth and fill my stomach, I have food to place in front of my children and watch them enjoy.  Not only is it food,  its health whole food that I can feel satisfied in serving them.  It will nourish their growing bodies.  Today I just want to be thankful for food alone.

The thankfulness scripture for today is Psalm 95:2-3 Let us come before him with thanksgiving and extol him with music and song. For the Lord is the great God, the king above all gods.

So as the psalm says, let us come before him with thanksgiving for the food that we can afford to put on our tables to feed our bodies and our families. Let us take time to remember how fortunate we are in America to have that food readily available for us. Let us remember that our next meal comes from the greatest provider and giver of all.

Thank you Lord for the food I put on our table and into my mouth. thank you Lord for providing all my needs physically, spiritually and emotionally. Lord Jesus help me not become greedy and ungrateful for the way that all my needs are provided and not loose sight of He who provides them for me. In Jesus name, Amen

Signing off from one woman to another,

Jenny Wren

I really like being made aware of my senses. The sense of smell with the leaves around me and the district smell of fall. The sense of hearing as I listen to my kids playing with cousins they don’t see often.  Today we are asked what color we are thankful for.  I am thankful for more than one color.  In the east the fall colors are spectacular.  Like nothing native kansans (unless they travel) have ever seen.  Fall is my favorite time of year.

Over the years as I have returned home to PA, I remember driving back to my mom’s house for the two hour trip. On that highway there are many turns that rise up the hills and the views are spectacular. When fall is fully set on there are vibrant reds, yellows, oranges, and greens painting the mountainside. It is a sight to be seen.

As a child I traveled further north plenty of times. Vermont and Massachusetts are two of the most spectacular places to travel in the fall. If you have never been there you must go. Even the colors in PA are not anything compared to the New England states.

My favorite color is red. Its so bright and vibrant. It used to not be my favorite. I used to like blue. But something changed. My house is adorned with red curtains and walls. I like wearing bright reds yellows and oranges shades of fall of course.

What a wonderful thing to be able to see. See the colors of the bright blue sky and spectacular oranges and pinks and sometimes purples of the sunset. God paints the skies almost daily in Kansas. Now something about the East might be the spectacular colors of fall , but something in Kansas is the spectacular sky line that God paints each day. There is nothing like a Kansas sunset. You wouldn’t know it until you stay here long enough but if you look far into the west during sunset the colors are so vibrant and beautiful. Little J almost daily draws m,y attention to the sunrise as we are driving the boys to school. She says “Mommy, wook buful sunset! Mommy! Wook!” Oh, to see the world from the eyes of a child. It would be so full of awe and newness. What a blessing to be reminded of.

The thankfulness scripture for the day is. Daniel 2:23 I thank and praise you, God of my ancestors: You have given me wisdom and power, you have made known to me what we asked of you, you have made known to us the dream of the king.

So as we take in the beautiful sights today, lets sit in awe of Gods creation. The fact that we can actually see it all and enjoy the vibrant colors he paints, for no other reason but to bring Him Glory.

Signing off from one woman to another.

Jenny Wren

 

Today I realized that this is already helping me to stop and really take in those things I am thankful for. I walk outside and sniff a little deeper it fills me with gratefulness to even be able to enjoy the smells around me.  Visiting with my sister in law and watching my children play with their cousins. I hear the laughter and see their smiles. What a blessing to have senses. A sense of smell, sight, touch, hearing, and taste. I can’t imagine living without one of those.

Sometime technology can really be a blessing.  I know of someone who can not talk or communicate well and he uses a tablet to type out what he wants to say and then it does the talking for him.  For me technology often interferes with my family and the things that bring me joy. I  heard it actually is addictive,  producing dopamine like a drug each time the sound goes off for a notification.  Sometimes I try to find satisfaction in going on Facebook and looking at other peoples lives. No wonder my brain thinks it brings satisfaction but, this often brings more discouragement than encouragement.

Day number two says, What technology are you thankful for?  I would have to say I am thankful for the App Audible. I can listen to different books while I am doing my house chores and it really helps the time go by quickly. I also enjoy it to relax and I really am in love with Jeanette Oaks Canadian West series. I love these books and I can not wait to pick it up again and listen when I have a quiet moment. Sometimes I don’t get a quiet moment so I put in my ear buds and drown out the ciaos that often fills my house. I imagine being right there in the Indian village in the far north with Elizabeth. Without Audible I don’t think I would pick up a book and read it. I simply don’t have that privileged and when I do have quiet moments I tend to not be able to concentrate. It you haven’t tried Audible I highly recommend it and if you want some fun books listen to Jeanette Oaks Canadian West series. I also have plenty of other suggestions I have already completed.

Today’s scripture verse for thankfulness is 1 Chronicle 29:13 Now, our God, we give you thanks, and praise your glorious name.

Lord Jesus, Thank you so much for technology and the way it can bless so many people . I pray that I would utilize it as a blessing. I also pray that I would have self control and use it only for the times I am not to have my attention elsewhere and not as a distraction to “get away” from the struggles of life. In Jesus Name, Amen.

 

Signing off from one woman to another.

Jenny Wren

Today as I was listening to the radio doing my daily drive to town to pick up kids from school, I heard a lady talk about doing a thankfulness challenge for November.  As I listened to it I thought that might be a great way to keep me out of my depressed funk I’ve been in the last few weeks.  I thought maybe it would challenge me even more to post my blog daily about the thing I’m thankful for.  To have a better guide going about this, I searched pinterest for a thankfulness challenge.  This list will help me do more than the general thankful for my kids, family, or weather. The normal easy things to find to be thankful for.  Here is what I found:

.So today being November 1st,  I am to say a smell I am thankful for. I love the smell of fall. Fresh fallen leaves along with the cooler air is so refreshing for my lungs and nose to smell. I also love the smell of wood burning stoves in the air from our neighbors. There is such a unique smell to fall and I absolutely love to walk outside and take a long sniff and enjoy that fresh cool smell.

What about you? What smell are you thankful for? Do you also like the smell of fall and fallen leaves?

Tomorrow I am looking forward to having my sister in law from out of town over for a campfire and we will thoroughly be enjoying all those smells which roasting our hot dogs and s’mores.

Thank you Lord for the fresh smell of fall, for the beautiful colors and the lovely slow falling leaves from the trees surrounding me. Thank you for the smell of wood burning stoves that bring back memories of my childhood and the stove my dad always had blazing in the fall and winter.

Thankfulness scripture

Psalm 107:1 Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.

I would love to know if you are reading this and going to join me on my thankfulness journey through November. Please comment below if you are going to join me. I will post this thankfulness challenge list daily so we can follow along together!

Signing off from one woman to another.

Jenny Wren

Today I’ve decided to write a less melancholy post. I think it is so easy to wallow in my sorrows and forget about the things I should be thankful for. The sun has shined this week, we are making progress on different things around our house and in our lives. My kids don’t stop growing up.

One of the greatest thing in the world is a knee high hug from the little sprout in your life. I’ve had a few of these over the years and now my biggest is giving me elbow high hugs. Where has the time gone? Today its time to pause and enjoy the little things and the little ones. The squeals of laughter the other night as ALL 4 of my kids played hide and seek without my help. This game was led by my oldest and it just warmed my heart to hear the laughter and the squeals and even little J age 3 counting on her own to at least 10. She’s so smart… but maybe I’m partial.

Some hugs come at full speed force, like from our energetic son D. He doesn’t do anything slow. He’s getting big enough, he has almost knocked me over in his excitement for a hug. Some hugs are long squeezes after a discipline problem. Some are quick when they start feeling awkward about a hug. One thing I am still enjoying is none of our kids don’t want a hug.

Some hugs are used to stall during bedtime.  Like when J lays down, all of a sudden she needs a hug and kiss from every person from our family.  She isn’t satisfied if you give her a pat on the back, it must be a full on hug with both arms and a squeeze.

Hugs are healing. They heal my hurt and my heart especially hugs from my children. My heart gets warm and my worries disappear as they squeeze.

When I was little my grandpa started giving me hugs over the phone. We lived far away for half my childhood.  I could always expect for him to give me the sound of a hug and a few smooches every time we said goodbye over the phone.  He did this up until he went to heaven.  He’d say as he hugged “squeeze the liver outta you ” sometimes he did squeeze me so hard I thought the livers would come out. I miss him oh so much but I’m so thankful for the godly example he was of love and commitment to God and my grandma.

Hug your little ones today and linger a little longer.  Maybe “squeeze the livers out of them”.  I sure will!

Signing off from one woman to another.

Jenny Wren

 

 

You just sit. You don’t feel like moving, you know you have plenty to get done but your emotions are so overwhelming you can’t even move. I’ve had this debilitating emotional pain many times over the years.  I sit in my chair wailing. I am in the deep dark place and I feel this overwhelming loneliness. I began to look deep inside to see why it may be there. I realized then the grief has never been grieved for. The years have flown by without a pause of grief. without a pause to mourn for the lost in my life. Life just keeps moving. In other cultures grief is something that is sat upon and lived in for awhile. They dress in their death garb and do their death dances with their drumming and such. I never lived in such a culture. But in western society grief is something that is whizzed by. We have our memorial service, our burial and then you just go back and continue in your life with out a time of linger in that grief.

I never lived in that grief I didn’t do my death dance. I never wallowed in my sorrow and sat there for any amount of time. I went right into being a care giver for my husband and family.  I put my own feelings and hurts aside to be there for my husband and kids. That’s what being a good mom is right? Being a good mommy is being healthy for your family.  So whether I’m depressed or still grieving I need to be healthy for them again.

Your physical Health is connected to emotion. I for so long have been awed by God creating such an intricate design in the human body. Each part is uniquely woven together and works well together.  This week I’ve been so exhausted.  I found out last week that I am deficient in vitamin d.  But not only that but I have several other deficiencies that cause feelings of depression and tiredness.

When I found this out, one of my friends went to work trying to get me back to normal.  I’ve now received  several supplements that should help me feel better. In the mean time I am trying to enlist more help from the children and A and simplifying life.

But its OK to take a step back and stop. Its OK to care for yourself and figure out what works for your family. Its OK to throw in a frozen pizza and call that supper.

Healing doesn’t happen over night and sometimes I wish I could just have God point his finger on me and make me well again. Make the debilitating emotion go away and get better. So I pray and I lean into Jesus so he leans into me.

Signing off from one woman to another

Jenny Wren

 

I could give you a nice update about my family and what our kids have been doing. I could write about my daily activities about fall coming or about the soup I’ve been dying to make. But the honest truth of it is I have been having an incredibly hard time with life.  Fall brings lots of changes. Changes in the colors of the earth, changes in the weather and temperature, start of school. But in the last few years fall also has brought feelings of discouragement for me. Hopelessness is sometimes overwhelming.

Depression is something that effects way too many people. In Christian circles if you say your feeling hopeless or you are feeling discouraged we are led to believe we must not be praying enough, close enough to God or doing the right things to feel better. For many years I didn’t recognize that the reason I  was so discouraged was because I actually have an imbalance in my brain.  Depression is something that effects a lot people and they don’t even realize, but even worse than that is if they do know something is wrong they are scared of the judgment of those around them. Their friends and family say look at that girl over there that is not close enough to God to get her satisfaction from Him and she needs medication to “cope” with life. Maybe they don’t verbalize it but I have received backlash from family for taking a medication to help me through a rough time. So you keep your feelings quiet and slowly you begin to loose sight of who you actually are. You are told to pick up your boot straps and keep going. This happened to me. I believe I have struggled with these feelings for years.

In 2010 my dad died from cancer. Our first child W was 1 1\2  and I was expecting our second child D. The weekend he died, A had his first seizure out of many that would come. I didn’t realize then the effects of his death and , A’s sickness would have on me for 8 years to come. Maybe I even have some post traumatic stress disorder.

After A’s first seizure he didn’t have another one for over a year. We had our second son D and he was around 8 months when the seizures began again. A starting having a grand mal seizure as soon as we lied down and he began falling asleep. I called 911 and he was coming around by the time the ambulance had come. His parents came to stay with our little ones and I followed the ambulance with his father in their van. We had no idea what would come but I knew these were seizures. I tried to be strong and we were released from the hospital only to have him have another seizure the next morning. Before the day was over he had 2 more seizures and he was admitted to the hospital for monitoring. He had 3 days of this seizure episode’s. When we returned home I was the caregiver for two small children and a worn out husband. A seizure like that causes extreme tiredness and achy muscles because of the electric shock running through your body.  I did what I needed to to meet my families needs. My mom came to help me and our world began to go back to normal. But I still didn’t realize the impact of pushing my needs aside to care for my family was having.

After going through this nightmare, we met with a neurologist who basically laughed at our questions. He prescribed a very old drug to control seizures. I didn’t know the side effects of A being on a very strong drug would have on our family. I also had no clue what side effects he would face and we would face as a family. A began to be agitated very easily and we began fighting more regularly. We switch neurologists and he prescribed a more up to date drug. But the side effects were the same. Extreme forgetfulness, agitation, anger outburst, he forgot so much he forgot some very important events one summer.

We discovered a natural doctor who told A  to go on a gluten free diet. So with 1 and 3 year old boys and a husband who was still sick I started to change our diet to gluten free. I had no idea when I lied  down on the pillow if I would wake up to that awful sound of a seizure. I began to totally change the way I was cooking and feeding my family. And instead of taking time for myself I continued to take care of my family. Doing what I thought was expected of me.

At times I felt so alone and that I had no one to look to. I spent years asking many different women to be my mentor trying to get help with the feelings I was having. I tried to God my way through it. I thought I just wasn’t trying hard enough or being godly enough. I knew something was wrong deep inside me but I couldn’t get it to be better.

We were expecting again and I was extremely overwhelmed. I kept having babies and caring for everyone and everything and nothing helped me. At the time the next round of seizures came we had 3 little boys we had gone through the worst time in our marriage since we were married and A started having another round of seizures. This time we didn’t go to the hospital. I knew the best way to deal with a seizure was let them sleep it off. The doctor didn’t do much at the er anyway and we called our neurologist the next day.  (Dsclaimer – Seizures can be deadly if they go for very long the person can loose consciencness so I would recommend a doctor if you think someone is having seizure activity. I knew what A’s were like and he never stopped breathing. ) At this point I don’t remember how many he had during that round but I do know he was down for a week or so.

A few people reached out to us during these times and helped us cope at the moment when it was happening. I am so thankful for the help that was given to us and I don’t want anyone to think that it was unappreciated. I was dying inside and no matter what anyone did to help during the intense hardship we faced I was still dying. So thank you from the bottom of my heart. Meals and encouraging notes are so sweet during those hard time.

When the notes stop coming the hurt and suffering is still there.  Or for me it was the fear of my husband starting to have a seizure when I had just fallen asleep.

Thankfully A became well enough he weaned himself off the seizure meds and he has been seizure free for 4 years. We had our 4th and last baby (little girl J). But life turned tough and last year we experienced the hardest year in our marriage. I was out of control with my emotions and I felt like I needed to be calm for my family and nothing was helping that I was trying. I went to the doctor and was prescribed a very small dose of Prozac. It helped me to stay calm in my house that was  out of control. I took some flack from family members but I was sure I was only going to take it for a few months to get through a tough part in our marriage so one of us was calm. I did wean off of it with no bad effects.

Then in February my mom died from a heart attack suddenly.  It is only now this week the depression has hit me again and as I’m writing this I realize more and more I do have PTSD. I can’t God my way out of this. I’m not ungodly or Luke warm. There’s not a spiritual problem. Its a problem in my brain from trauma in my life. If you have ever experienced someone having a grand mal seizure you would understand the traumatic experience that this is. But not only that, I’ve lost two parents in eight years and almost went through a separation in my marriage.

If you have feelings like this please don’t listen to the voices telling you that you must not be godly enough or that you don’t pray enough. Go to your doctor or see a counselor and get help.

God bless you all and know I love you and so does God and you can get through this. Sometimes you have to take care of yourself first. Like the airplane, put on your own gas mask first and then assist those around you. If you don’t take care of yourself first eventually you won’t know who yourself is.

Signing off, still finding myself.

From one woman to another,

Jenny Wren

I have been wanting to write a post about our journey through home school, our decision to send our kids to public school and now our choice to send our kids to the small private school about 25 min from us.

As we began having kids A and I started talking about whether we wanted to home school or not. A was adamant about not sending our kids to public school or any school and I was open to options but to respect my husbands desires I started looking into homeschooling our oldest W even before he was school age. I wanted so badly to be the home school mom with the great home school room, all organized with my pupils being attentive and succeeding each day.  I ordered some preschool curriculum and set out to do “preschool” when W was 4. This meant that year I had a 2 year old and newborn also to tend to. This really wasn’t something I should have tried looking back on it. I think I just wanted so badly to succeed. But in the middle of that I failed and crashed and burned.

After the preschool curriculum failed I continued to search for the “right fit” for me and my son. I bought all kinds of different preschool curriculum and continued to crash and burn. When W was kindergarten age I got a hold of a curriculum called teach your child to read in 100 easy lessons. Now this was my cup of tea. Though his grandmas both taught him a bunch, we breezed through that book and finished in a good amount of time. As we began 1st grade I was weary. I had a 1 year old, 3 year old, 5 year old and a 7 year old. Things were rough with our marriage A and I were working through anger issues and stress from A’s outside work and My home school overcame us. W barely got the chance to succeed. We took a lot of “mental health” days and went to the zoo or our science center to “get away” from the intensity that was home life.  I would say that that year he fell way behind. I remember having visions of all of my 4 kids ages 7,5,3 and 1 sitting outside under the shade tree on a blanket reading about Napoleon or James Elliott. But in reality I would get everything set up and by that time the 5 and 3 year old had run off and were getting into trouble of some kind.

When you finally admit you  can no longer do something yourself. Especially something that you had visions of doing for years to come it takes a lot of humility. But it is also very freeing to give that responsibility to someone whose job it actually is.

Continuing to submit to my husbands will for me to home school our kids I ordered curriculum for W and D for the next year. I was excited about it all and could not wait to get started. I realized soon after that, that my emotional health was spent. I was reacting to small things in big ways by screaming and I couldn’t handle it anymore. One month after much time of trying to convince A to send our kids to school we decided nothing would hurt to at least go and see  what the public school was like. We liked the small size that it was. They only have K-2nd grades and a total of about 50 students. We loved the setting and felt God give us peace to send the boys there.

After the first week we realized it wasn’t as quaint as we thought. Bullying started and our boys began to lash out. (I believe they were doing what they saw their parents doing when we were dealing with our issues). We wanted to stick it out through the whole year, hopeful that it was just a season. We disciplined for any issue that was brought to our attention but we really felt they were teased and not understood and the staff didn’t give us much help in actually resolving the problem between the students. We reached out for help and nothing was done about it. This makes me so sad because our boys were pegged as the bullies and we knew they were lashing out for the teasing that was being done. It was a great learning experience but we are thankful the Lord has directed us differently this year.

I’m not going to fool myself into thinking it was just the kids in the school we went to last year. I am not going to pretend our kids didn’t had some issues with all the parts of school. Social, academically, and respect for the staff. But I also know my kids can do better than that and I have the understanding of grace and love for those boys. I also know that in a Christian community with parents who have like minded discipline and staff that are God loving people, it gives kids pegged as “bullies” in public school a second chance. So this year we get that second chance. We are attending a very small Christian school about 23 minutes from our house.

This school has a total of 25 students. Our boys class has a total of 7 kids, grades 1-3. The staff love Jesus with all their hearts and they partner with us as parents to teach this to our kids. The Lord has blessed us immensely with this school and I am excited about getting a new start. We are also “healthier” as a family. We are “healthier” as a couple and our boys are “healthier” and doing much better at working through disappointment. I am anxious about the academics. This school uses a more advance curriculum. But I know God has called us here and I also know our boys thrive on being challenged and they are both extremely intelligent. We might have some hard work ahead of us but I am confident that the teachers will be right along side us helping our kids through any struggle that might arise.

I don’t think that public school is bad. We had a very bad experience and I know there are many great schools out there and not all teachers are like the ones in this school either. This school could be perfectly fine for many other children. It was just not a good experience for us. I have no hard feelings. I know we had an all around tough year with my moms death and our family struggles it was not all the schools fault.

I also want to say that homeschooling could be perfectly fine for someone else. I love home school and really wanted to succeed at it. God had other plans for us and each year we will make the decision for what the plan should be for a our children and each year each parent does the same for their child. So whether you are homeschooling, are a public school family or a private school family Keep doing what you are doing and keep up the good work! But especially Love on those kids of yours!

Signing off from one woman to another.

Jenny Wren

I had this idea fly into my head. Why don’t we go to this state park we have never been to and go camping for a few nights. So we packed everything up and were off later than I wanted to on Thursday night. We stopping to get some food on our way and arrived at camp around 6:30.  Not long after we arrived and found a camp site we liked the thunder started on the north and south of us. We had a strip of blue sky right over top of us. Should we set up and risk getting rained on and being in a tent in a thunder storm or should we drive back home with some very disappointed kids. We decided to stay and set up. So we set up our tent and then our little easy up canopy and tied some tarps off of it so if it rained we would have a cover.  The whole time we saw and heard thunder on both sides.

We got a little sprinkle but we were able to start a fire and have some hot dogs and marshmallows. Here is a picture of our view.

God was really good to us. The rain did not come onto us until the kids were all asleep. Something that I didn’t plan for was all the bug bites. They ate all of us really badly and I had no anti itch cream or I usually use Lavender oil to help with bites. I had none of that oil. SO the first night all of the kids were tossing and turning and I am pretty sure I almost lost my mind when W says to me mommy I need to go potty at 4 Am. I said ok go behind the tent in the trees he said I have to go poop. So I stumbled up to the bathroom and stumbled back. ugh. Who’s crazy idea was it to go camping anyway?

The mosquito had a feast on us but we were also extremely hot. In PA you make sure to bring long pants and sweat shirts along with lots of blankets because the evenings  get so cold. Not here in KS. It was hot the whole night. I think I just used a sheet and all my kids were sweaty in their sleeping bags.  We all tossed and turned until dawn when all the kids were up. Thankfully A got up and made a fire with the kids and I stayed in bed for a little bit longer.

That day we spent riding bikes, exploring the camp ground, cooking food and going swimming. By the end of the night everyone was eaten alive and we had no anti itch cream and we thought if we didn’t get some kind of cream we may not get through the next night with any more sleep. So Adam went to the town 40 minutes away and I watched the kids play in the water. It was so nice watching the sun set as my kids ran in and out of the water playing with each other. Even J ran in and out on her own. It made my heart happy to see that. We got through the night with more sleep and first thing in the morning a young couple pulled in and set up camp next to ours. We didn’t know if we were going to stay another night but when we saw 5 other vehicles pull in and two other tents being set up with what looked like college age kids or a little older we knew it was going to be a party all night and probably keep us up so we decided we would pick up camp and go home that day.

God must have given us prompting because we came hope to two very bad situations. The first thing we saw was my new glass patio table shattered into piece. It was definitely not the thing we wanted to see when we had a car filled with things to unpack and laundry to do. But Adam went right to work sweeping the glass from the deck and had it cleaned up rather quickly.  I unpacked the car and then entered the house. When I opened the door I heard whining coming from J’s bedroom. I opened the door to find our dog, shep locked inside. In the rush of our packing he snuck in the house and ended up in her room and someone closed the door on him. I also saw the door frame trim clawed so bad it had broken off and there were splinters everywhere. That poor dog 🙁 I then let him outside and went back in to assess the damage and how many messes we would have to clean up. He left no mess. He held his pee and poop for 2 days! He is such a great dog. Wow I couldn’t believe it.

We figured there was a big wind storm that took our umbrella and sent it flying,  hitting the glass on the table and shattering it. I am very sad about this since I just bought it in June.  I am more amazed that I didn’t have a mess to clean up from the dog. He’s a keeper. Sorry I didn’t get any pictures because my phone was captive in my bag in the car for most of this HEHEHE.

The next morning we woke up to a very wet outside and again thanked God he prompted us to go home Saturday so we didn’t have to pack up camp in the rain.

We loved this spot so much we are now making plans to go camping with some of our friends before winter hits 🙂 But two things we must have is a tent bug sapper and a battery operated fan 🙂

Signing off from one crazy to another.

Jenny Wren