Making Imperfect Progress

Time travels at the speed of light sometimes. This is what seems to have been happening through the month of June. I don’t think I have had any time to sit down on my computer or even time to think about what I should write on this blog. Summer speeds away and so do my kids and their growth. We hit birthday season. W turn 9, C turned 5, and I turned ???. We sped through two weeks of bible school, one of which I volunteered to be a crew leader and I led 6, 5 year olds around the church to their different classes. This was fun and also exhausting. I am unsure if I will do it again next year especially since my youngest will be old enough to be part of the Bible school.

This week has been the first week in about a month I haven’t been in town almost every day. Yet I am still very busy. Painting our deck, cleaning our yard and making a back yard paradise.

I don’t think I have written about our deck project yet. After my mom passed away we received some inheritance money. To honor my mom I decided to use it to build a deck. (Well Adam did most of the work). It was so fun to get out there and drill holes in the ground, use an impact screw driver and watch Adam enjoy building something of his own. We had our friend help us a few days and he did a wonderful job making everything level and creating a beautiful outdoor space that we can use for many years to come. I also bought a table and chairs set for the deck and will be making a beautiful fire ring along with moving some of our kids activity areas to the yard closest to the deck. (trampoline, slide, playhouse I scored for 15$) We now have what I call a glorified kiddie pool and all the fun we could dream of for the rest of the summer. It is a work in progress and things are still progressing. This comes a problem when you can’t run the chainsaw but limbs need trimmed and you can’t use the loader but buildings need moved. So I wait for A to help me.

I am so thankful for this deck already. It is so beautiful.

Right now my emotions and thoughts are mumble jumble. Mothers day did me in and then my birthday followed and wasn’t any easier. But life speeds on whether I want it to or not. My kids are growing and changing and life is changing too. We are contemplating some big changes to our future and trust in God is something that needs to be the for-front of my heart and life. Its hard not having my advice giver close by. Its hard not to be able to call to tell her something I am excited about or sad about.

My sister has become my main advice giver. She said I am like the trunk of our family tree. Now my choice is to be planted by the river of life that springs out joy and love and grace and trust and faith.

I am looking forward to seeing what God has in store for us. We have already received some exciting new about our boys being accepting to the Christian school we applied for. We also are looking forward to a family vacation and then a trip with just me and the kids coming both in July. After that we have a full extra two weeks off school because our school doesn’t start until after labor day.

God is so faithful waiting for me to come to him and then my faith waivers and he waits for me. He says “I am here my child” “Come to me all you who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest.” Rest in the Lord is so difficult in trials among the valley. But he is the lamp to my feet that guides my step. My God is bigger than all the trials I have and am facing right now.

I know this isn’t very uplifting but my progress has been so imperfect recently. Why is it easy to go to the right place when things are tough but when things seem easier I always loose focus and think hey I am OK without God right now.  Then I get back into this emotional slump.  I always seem to fall out of habits that are so good when things start feeling better. I need to get back in the Word and follow his commands to spend time with him each day.

Imperfect progress is what life is about. In parenting, In my marriage, In my relationship with the Lord. They are all imperfect. My house cleaning, paintings, My photography. It is all imperfect. Thankfully we don’t need to be perfect. That is not a requirement for God. He wants us to love him and serve him each day of our lives. But perfection is not received until the race is complete and we are in heaven. Thank You Jesus!

 

Parents are everything. They have raised you and put into you their whole lives. They help you navigate through life when you feel stuck. They pick up and help you financially in a minute if you need it. Even when you don’t want it they help you.

When I was younger, like most kids, I didn’t appreciate my parents. I grew up with my mom and dad together until I was 8 then my mom and little sister moved to NY state and our lives seriously changed. My dad was no longer a main roll in my life. Before the split I remember him coming in the door to 4 little girls so excited to see him. He was very tall and seemed like a giant to little me. He would help us dunk basketballs and helped us ride our bikes. It was always such a joyous time with my dad around. I remember life being easy. We lived in the country in what we refer to as “the little house”.  My dad built it himself from toe nailed boards (You take to small boards and nail them together to make a longer board). This house still stands today.  He also built us a play house with a loft and all. I have tons of memories of playing house in our play house by the creek. We had hours of fun together in that little house.

When we moved to NY state we lived with a man who had more money than we ever knew. He provided for every need we had. He even gave us the love of a step dad. He provided a good life for us. I remember summers at the lake on our boat. We had lovely vacations and every need we had was met. My mom worked hard for us and gave us all we needed. In spite of my mom doing the best she could I still rebelled and disobeyed her rules. I made some terrible choices.  My mom still loved me unconditionally no matter what I did wrong. She tried hard to give us everything and help us to live the right way.

When I was 16 we moved back to our home town and lived in our little house again. My mom still provided for us and worked hard. She no longer had a husband to provide for her and she did the best she could.

7 years ago I lost my dad to cancer. I lost a man that gave me advice. He was always there for me. He was a fixer of all things and if I called him with a problem in my house or a project I wanted to do he always had a way I could do it, patiently teaching me along the way (Mostly over the phone). When I lost him there was definitely a gap left open. But my mom still filled in the rest. I missed him terribly.

4 month ago when I lost my mom I felt like the world stopped. Though I got through the initial loss by reading scripture and staying busy there was a lot of pain. A few weeks ago around mothers day the extent of this loss suddenly hit me. I was no longer receiving the encouragement a mom gives you. Telling you the truth in love but also telling you how your doing a good job and she is proud of you. For some reason this loss is so staggering some days I don’t know how to function. I don’t have a daily encourager. I don’t have my best friend who knows without me telling them, She just knew. I never realized how much that encouragement drove me through life to do better and keep going.

While my husband tries its just not possible for him to meet that encouragement need that I have. My sister has been awesome telling me the truth when I need to hear it. But shes my sister also not meeting the encourager need.  I also have some great friends and a sister in-law who love me but it is just not my mom.

So when the hurt is staggering and I don’t know what to do. I just embrace the pain and feel it hard. It will get easier to deal with the great grief I feel but it also take time and a lot of tears. Its OK for me to cry (man I sure have a lot more lately).  Sometimes I just need my mom to tell me I am doing good at this hard life.  That she is proud of me and that she loves me dearly.

I’ve decided to make sure I am this more for my kids. I try to tell them how much I love them each day and how proud I am of them even when they disappoint me. I want to be this encourage for my children because I know some moms are not that. And I would say if you still have your mom around call her up and thank her for being there for you and encouraging you. Because when she is gone you won’t know what to do and you will wish you had told her more.

Signing off from one woman to another.

Jenny Ren

As a mom and wife things sometimes start piling up. It is hard to keep up with all the demands life throws at me. After my week last week I am trying to play catch up.  My laundry is sky high and my house work has been neglected. I have yet to fall back into my full fly lady routine since after my moms death in February.  Ladies my house is cluttering up. It is time to start de-cluttering again. Last week I was preparing for my art show. I then got called and told our whole beef is ready to pick up from the meat locker. Things got put on hold and some things became priority. (Like defrosting my freezers to fit the whole beef.) The other thing that is happening is that the weather has now changed from cold to warm and I feel it is safe to rotate my children’s clothes into there summer wardrobes and in order to do that I need to go through the current wardrobe and get rid of clothes. In 6 days my two oldest kids will be home for the summer and I have a lot of things I want to do before this happens like de-cluttering, going through toys, cleaning there room and so on. I also have a baby quilt I am making for my friend that I have not sewed that I am sending to someone else who is going to machine quilt it for me. Guess what? The quilt isn’t sewn let alone ready to be quilted and she is asking for it so she can get that jobs done because I am sure she is a little more organized than me. Its piling up.

Last week I did all the things that were priority but the biggest priority is my kids. The time when C asks “mommy can you build with me?” I need to stop and build with them. I am learning more that the time I give them is more important than the time I put into a clean organized house and all the other things that demand my attention.

This week I made a list of the projects I want done before my oldest boys get out of school and yesterday guess what I did. Some of my projects but when c asked me to build with him I did.  Lego’s are not my forte. Hand me some dolls and I can play mommy with the best of them but I am learning to play the Lego’s the longer I have sons.

When my life starts piling up I start neglecting the important things in life. Whats important? My family, my relationship with God and my friendships. So when my 4 year old asks me to push him on the swing, what should I do? I take the time out and push him on the swing (it doesn’t always happen). It is such a battle daily to keep the important things in view and then fill the rest after that. Its like the visual example of a jar. If you fill the jar with the sand then the pebbles the rocks won’t fit. But if you fill the jar with the big rocks (important stuff) then the pebbles then the sand you can fit everything in. When I start loosing sight of the important things I try to take a few minutes and prioritize what actually is important. House work can wait.

My kids won’t be little forever and so many times I push them aside for all the THINGS I NEED to get done. The thing I need to do is go spend that time with my boy especially since we have only one more year with him home. Time to stop blogging and take care of the important things in my life.

The best part about taking time with my little ones is that I get to start seeing their unique personalities forming. Here’s a few pictures of my kids and the Lego’s I built for them and silly selfies 🙂

Signing off from one woman to another.

Jenny Ren

Mothers Day, A time to honor mothers. A special day just for us! How great is that. Mother’s Day was always an extra special time for us. I’ve had many different Mothers. Spiritual Mothers, a Mother in law and My Mom in heaven now. Mothers do everything. When somethings lost they find it, When someone is hurt they heal it. Even when your grown your mom still heals your pains emotional or physical.

When I was a kid Mothers day was a time we made sure our mom stayed in bed and then we set loose in the kitchen. We made french toast (My mom’s least favorite) Then one time I thought why waste the left over dip for the bread and I fried cinnamon eggs. I never knew she didn’t like french toast until I was an adult and tried making it for her for breakfast. Cinnamon eggs went down in history as the worst thing on earth. Thankfully we always had a dog she fed those things to so that we never knew she didn’t like it. The dog wouldn’t even eat the cinnamon eggs they were that bad. We would then place the plate on a beautiful tray then a flower and bring her orange juice.

In my family special days like birthdays and mothers day were ALWAYS elaborate.  It was an all day occasion. We would wake up to my mom serving us a delicious breakfast in bed. Not cinnamon eggs, but probably our favorite breakfast like waffles or pancakes along with sausage and maybe even toast and eggs. She would get up early and then most times she even went to the store before she prepared a full breakfast for us.  It was laid out on a beautiful tray and We felt like queens. In fact we never really needed a special occasion for her to give us breakfast in bed. There was a time I brought some of my friends home to stay overnight with me and she served all of us breakfast in bed. It was a special occasion to her to  just have my friends stay overnight! This is just what moms do.

When I knew my first mother’s day without my mom on earth was coming, I wanted to do something that  would help us with our grieving process. While most of my kids are still small enough they don’t really grieve. My oldest has been having trouble crying at night missing my mom. So I decided to send letters to heaven on balloons. We wrote our letters to my mom telling her how much we love and miss her. Then we sent them off into the sky. It was really helpful to me and my grieving. I know they didn’t actually go to her. My kids seemed to really like drawing hearts and pictures on the balloon and writing I love you and I miss you.  We also had some hard questions to answer, Like does Mammie read these and will she see them? Its hard to explain something that your not really sure about yourself. I know she is in heaven but we don’t know if she sees us. I explained to them that Mammie’s spirit is in heaven and we do know she is having so much fun worshiping Jesus everyday. They felt better sending them off to her and I did too. I hope to make this a yearly Mothers day tradition.

Yesterday my family celebrated me too. They gave me a cinnamon roll for breakfast, took me to dinner and we finished the night with our balloon ceremony and ice cream with strawberries at home with A’s parents.

Sometimes Mother’s Day isn’t a joyful day. Sometimes its very hard. My Mother’s day this year was very hard for me. It was hard to handle not being able to see or hear my moms voice. It was hard because sometimes my expectations cloud what I should really be focused on and I have a bad attitude because my husband isn’t living up to what I think mother’s day should look like.  Sometimes it is really special when I look at the important things. My kids and my husband and how much I love watching them play together and interact. I am Thankful for the time we can have together and hopeful for the future.

 

Happy Mother’s Day to all you mom’s out there. Thank you for all that you do for your family. Some of you even do things for people who are not your family and are spiritual mothers. Thank you for everything you do.

Signing off from one woman to another .

Jenny Ren

Today was a Monday. Why are Mondays so terrible. If I actually had a regular job I think Mondays would be hard because it starts a work week and you have all week before you have a day off. But as a mom, Mondays can be any day because every day blends together and there can be a “Monday” type of day on Thursday, Saturday and usually Sunday (Don’t get me started on how inconvenient church time is 😉 or how I keep working just as much if not harder on Sunday because its another day my family needs me.)

But today WAS Monday in every terrible sense of the word. Getting ready for school goes something like this. “Do you have your socks on?” “Yes” “now find your shoes its almost time to leave” Child now walks around aimlessly and 30 seconds later says “I can’t find my shoes” Then you start going through the list did you look in the entry way, did you look in your room. Things would be a whole lot easier if you took my advice and took your shoes to the entry way when you took them off.  Now shoes are found and the back packs are missing.  Repeat show saga… Finally off to school 🙂

For two weeks now I have had low back pain. I half fell on some rocks with J and trying to keep her from hitting the ground I threw my back out. I have made repeat trips to the chiropractor and it has not gotten much better. Sleep often helps but I can usually still feel it in the morning. I also came down with a nasty cold this weekend and I believe today has been the worst. I am currently taking many different natural remedies, but it has not made things much better.  So when J didn’t get a nap today and neither did I it added to my stress level.  The night started nicely. My mother in law brought me some lemon grass plants for my new patio and I planted them in some pots. I hope they will repel mosquito’s this summer.  The kids were playing outside nicely and really no one was fighting. Then an hour before supper time A discovered that our car tire was hissing and loosing air. He then took the car to the repair shop to get the tire fixed.

Things continued to go OK until D came to me and said W said the D word. Of course W denies it. Then not two minutes later D said C said the D word. I hate tattling and I hate kids that say words that shouldn’t be repeated especially since I don’t say that word and I know who they picked it up from. I also don’t really know what to do when someone tattles especially about words spoken. I usually don’t believe tattling. But who knows. Then I lost it. I started screaming for everyone to go to bed and that daddy would take care of it when he came home. I then called A and asked why he wasn’t home yet. He was talking with a friend and not thinking about me who was sick and tired with all the children. I know I must sound like a whiner but man people this is my real life. He was still a little ways away. I was sobbing on the couch when J came to me and said “Mommy just relax” “relax mommy” That just softened my heart. She was right I needed to relax and I needed a break. I didn’t take one in time and I sure should have. So tonight I was done Momming.

Boy am I glad for do overs. Tomorrow starts a new day and A is tucking the kids in bed tonight so I can take a break and write to all of you. When he got home he hugged me and reassured me that I was just over tired and sick. He then took care of the hearts of my kiddos and then they came to me and I took care of my heart and we all apologized for our bad behavior.

There you go this is the exact reason I call my blog making imperfect progress. Geeze I had another battle with imperfection and sin and I have a chance to start again. Hopefully I can wake up feel a little better and be able to attend my art class tomorrow.  I hope each day to see the progress I can and have made and even in those imperfect times (which are a lot) I can confess the sin and move on to a new day or hour or even minute. Thank You Jesus!

Man I shouldn’t have thought earlier that I haven’t had any interesting stories recently to write about… That is the last time I will think THAT!

Signing off from one woman to another.

Jenny Ren

What are little boys made of?
What are little boys made of?
Snips and snails
And puppy-dogs’ tails
That’s what little boys are made of

What are little girls made of?
What are little girls made of?
Sugar and spice
And everything nice
That’s what little girls are made of.

I am not really sure the truth of this nursery rhyme or if its author actually had little girls or boys. Here is my experience with both 🙂

I grew up in a household of girls. We had all girl cousins until I was around 12. Then we had 3 boy cousins all in a row but I did not live close to them until I was around 16. But even then I wasn’t around long enough to really get to know them. So I never had much close experience with boys. I had all nieces on my side of the family until I married Adam and those nephews lived far away.  I had the first boy on my side of immediate family.

He was definitely different from the girls I grew up with. He was a little red head with a fiery personality to boot. The day he was born he was eating but apparently not getting enough so he pulled away from my breast hollered at me and then latch back on. He has been stating his business ever since.  Boys are different. He was at a friends house when he was around one year old, with her little daughter who was the same age. The little girl (R) had a baby. She would hold the baby, rock the baby and gently lay it down on the floor. When W got a hold of it he took the doll threw it on the floor and body slammed it.

When I had my second boy He was a lot more rambunctious. He got into everything. When he was two his brother spray painted him and the tree and the wagon black. Very early on he began learning how to unscrew everything. One day I caught him trying to unscrew the screen door from the door jam. He will often be found with dirt or grease all over him. W on the other hand is neater when he plays and doesn’t like to be dirty. If there is a puddle D walks right through it and W walks around it. On most days you will find at least one wrestling match going on between at least two of the boys.

C is my sweet, very sensitive boy, but he is a brute. If he runs into you he will knock the wind out of you. We call him hulk and also Hoss because he is so big. He is almost 5 and over 50 lbs. He loves animals and when our cat had kittens he named them all. He checks those kittens everyday. His brothers often make him cry because he is so very sensitive. His love language is physical touch but his favorite form is wrestling. He loves bugs, cats, dogs, horses, pretty much any animal. When his sister stepped on an ant he cried.

When we found out we were having a girl my sister sent us one of her daughters doll houses. This was before J was born. One day I found the boys playing army man in it. They had set the barbie dream house up as an army barracks hiding men behind the walls and furniture. I thought just you wait until you little sister is around to tell you whats what about that. She definitely does tell them whats what. 

Three years ago we had our darling little girl. I had visions dancing through my head of this sweet little cuddly child that would be a breath of fresh air after my rambunctious boys. I thought it would be much easier raising her after the boys because “girls are easy” or so I was told. While her favorite color is pink and she loves dresses, there is nothing dainty to her. She can wrestle with the rest of them and tries to take down one her brothers on a daily basis. Whoever said girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice didn’t have a little girl like J. While she is a little honey, she throws more fits in public than any of my boys. If she doesn’t get what she wants she screams a high pitch blood cuddling scream like nothing I have ever heard before. I never even knew there was a pitch that high. She can be talking in a cute little voice one minute and the next pinching your nose off because you want her to eat her food.  I would say she’s made up of  spice and sas everything rash. (I know it doesn’t rhyme)

I think it comes down to the fact that we have little sinners and each child is very different. While most boys could be found climbing trees playing with bugs or rolling in mud and most girls playing with dolls or running through flowers twirling in her dress There are exceptions to this.

I was graced with no “Easy” children. I believe God gave me these kids to help mold me into what I need to be. Man is it hard to be humble and patient each day. I also know that these little ones don’t stay little very long and I have learned and continue to learn to enjoy each day. So when we are at the home improvement store and they are driving the car cart around the sidewalk while waiting for A like its a race car, I just smile and laugh. We don’t always have all the time we want with each of them so lets make the time we do have great.

Signing off from one woman to another.

Jenny Ren

Tantrums, timeouts, and terrorists. Sounds like a day in the life as a mom. The amount of tantrums you handle each day is huge. When they are infants usually they cry because they need something. Every once in awhile your child will try to throw a fit around 9 months or so. They are frustrated because a toy won’t work or they can’t reach something they want to eat. Then they turn two and they up the anti. The tantrum is because they don’t want to come or they wanted something you told them no about.

Today the tantrum was over the wahwah (pacifier). J got into the car with me after a Doctors appointment and asked me right away for the wahwah. I didn’t respond but the next time she asked she screamed it WAHWAH!!!! I told her that she needed to ask me nicely or I wasn’t going to give it to her. This uped the level again WAAAHHHHHWAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I said no I will not give you the wahwah and then I turned the mirror so I could see her and I said if you scream at me like that again I will stop the car and spank your bottom. She didn’t ask me again for a little bit and when she did I told her she needed to ask nicely and she did so I gave it to her.

The other night we dealt with an 8 year old tantrum. This was because he was actually scared of something hurting but it was still a tantrum. He kicked and screamed, He ran outside, he tried to negotiate. Unfortunately he is becoming more difficult to convince (or better at negotiating) that what we are saying or asking is true or right. At this age he has his own opinions and definitely expresses them. I am pretty sure he thinks he could survive without us.

Sometimes the tantrums come in adult form. I definitely have thrown a few tantrums. I sometimes loose it (well actually I loose it a lot). There are times I certainly don’t want to deal with my emotions in the right way. I feel like laying on the floor kicking and screaming in my own tantrum. I don’t want to clean the house again, I don’t want to wash your clothes , I don’t want to do all this work and still have to be responsible for all these children that don’t act the right way anyway, no matter how many times I have tried to teach them this right way to act. I don’t want to keep my cool when they are screaming at each other and won’t stop fighting for the billionth time that day. I don’t want too, I don’t want too, I DON’T WANT TOO!!!!!!!

But I am their mother and unfortunately they are little mirrors of me. I like when they mirror the good things I do. It makes me feel proud. But boy is it convicting when they mirror the bad habits I have. A while back I was sitting reading my bible and writing in my journal and little J climbed up next to me. She wanted to write in my journal so I got one for her and she grabbed my phone (the bible was on it) and started scrolling down and writing a little and scrolling down more. THAT is precious.

Times outs are inevitable especially after tantrums. There have been times I have stuck all three boys in time out together holding hands. THAT’S my favorite way to give timeout for the fighting boys. Make them hold hands through the whole time. They sure do learn to sit and get a long a little better. Sometimes you negotiate with the little terrorist. You start walking into the store. OK guys lets all get along through the store. As time goes on you start saying things like . Be nice to your brother, stop pestering your sister. Then the real negotiations start happening. Mommy can I get this or that. No buddy we are just getting these few things and then we are out. Please, they start . No sweetie. Then they start wearing you down with fighting with their brother. You start saying again please stop fighting. Then an ingenious plan forms in your head, Bribery (terrorist negotiations) If you guys don’t fight the rest of the time I will buy these cookies. Well by the time you leave the store you are buying the cookies to shut them up from nagging you and they fight the whole way home. We don’t negotiate with terrorists. REALLLY? Just another day in the life of a mom.

Signing off from one woman to another.

Jenny Ren

Summer vacation is coming ya’ll. This is probably not a big deal to most of you. Your used to sending your kids to school for 9 months and then having them home for 3. I love my kids dearly but sometimes I struggle with getting the things done I need to and having whiny kids.  Just having them all home together adds such a different dynamic. Its no longer the little ones playing quietly.  The best remedy for my summer fears is to have a plan.

When our oldest was born A and I wanted to home school our kids from the very beginning. We bought the preschool curriculum and I had dreams of doing preschool with him even before he was 4. Then I had number two and he was a different bread. There was no way when W was 4 that I could do any kind of “school” with him with a newborn and my rambunctious 2 year old. So the preschool curriculum sat in a closet and became a point of irritation especially when the kids would take everything out and they were too small to put all of it back. I was exhausted and shouldn’t have even tried.

When W was 6 we started kindergarten. I did it very relaxed. He didn’t get very much other than learning to read. He loved school and reading and basically grandma taught him how to read and I only encouraged it with the book I used. When W was in first grade I was already at my whits end.  I had dreams of having everyone sit down and listen to read alouds and working together. We eventually got through most of the year and the summer and starting D in kindergarten was fun But I was just overwhelmed. I couldn’t keep up with all the demands.

We then decided to send our kids to the local public school.  I have now gotten used to having the older ones gone during the day and only having my little ones. This will be my first transition to summer from having them in school.

I am not very good at keeping schedules. I can make them just fine but carrying them out is a different story. So my plan is to have a schedule. I hope I can follow through with this schedule and not loose my mind in the process.

6-8 Wake up watch morning TV. (yes I have one that wakes at 6)

8 Breakfast

8:30 chores

9:00 bike ride/ walk

10 snack

10-12 Outside play

12 Lunch

12:30-1:30 rest/nap time

1:30 craft time (J Sleeping)

2:30 read aloud

3 snack

3:30-5 free play inside or out

5-6 evening tv time

6 Supper

7-8 Play outside

8:30 Bedtime

This is my plan. One day a week I plan to go to the zoo, park or science center.

The other thing that is a challenge to me is feeding my clan. We used to have three hot meals a day and I just could not keep up with the work and dishes it produced so during this summer I am going to try a new routine for my meals. This is my plan.

Breakfast will be Cereal, toast and Jelly, eggs (for Adam) and oatmeal or a shake for me/the kids who want that.

Lunch with be strictly cold things Sandwiches, egg salad, chicken salad, ham or turkey, PB &J. on the side will be fruit or fresh veggies I will cut those at the beginning of the week after my grocery shopping trip. Maybe chips once and awhile.

Dinner will be on the grill most nights. Steak, pork chops, chicken, hamburgers, hot dogs. I will marinade all the meat the day I buy them and stick them in the fridge.

Friday nights I have pizza night probably family night through the summer. Saturday breakfast is always pancakes, Lunch is always hamburgers. Sunday breakfast will be bacon and eggs (We are going to a new church that starts later so we can have a nice Sunday breakfast now 🙂 )

Maybe with this blog I can stay on track with this plan. I will certainly post updates about it through the summer. Happy planning.

Signing off from one woman to another

Jenny Ren

The other night Adam took me to the national abstract art opening at the art center I am taking classes at.  There we saw several of the ladies who are in my class. It was fun to chat with them out of class and get to know a few things about them. One of them commented how we live so far from town and said “I just don’t know how you do it, living so far out of town you must have to plan ahead a lot and I just couldn’t do it.” I told her it was something you just get used to and I really couldn’t imagine going to the store every night after I decide what i’m having for dinner. We chated a little long and I mae a stop at the store.

As I thought about what I should write next on my blog I decided to write about my menu planning and grocery sopping. I’ve had more than one person tell me they thought I had a talent with this and of course I really never thought that was true so I am sharing this skill that I have learned over the years for someone else who may be just starting with a large family and needs some tips and pointers of getting the huge shopping and mune planning complete.

Most of the time I have a running shopping list. I have things always on my list and most of them go with my THM eating plan. In order to make this list be able to fit each of you whether your eating THM or not I will not mention specifics as you should fill those things in yourself.

First I want to start by telling you the stores I love. I don’t often shop sales. If you do, good for you I totally have always wanted to be able to spend 50 dollars a week on groceries so if thats where your at coudos to you friend. I don’t shop with coupons or try extra to save money. I have never had the energy to do this kind of thing but I have always really wanted to. If you are an awesome couponer start a blog and I will totally read it and learn from you.

I’ve recently fallen in love with Aldi. If you have never shopped there before they have almost all my regular shopping items at a fraction of the cost. The reason they can have such great prices is because they don’t bag groceries and you have to bring your own bags. You also have to pay a quarter for your cart but you get it back when you return the cart. this cuts on cost of these extra workers other store have. They also have raw shelved with stacks of boxes so they don’t stock shelves just the boxes of items. Aldi also carries tons of organic items and gluten free.

I have also fallen in love with Costco. They have tons of gluten free items including the bread we love and frozen pizza. I love their produce because it always seems fresher than other stores. I love using my Costco credit card for gas because we get 4% back. Thats awesome. (I only use a credit card for my gas).

These are my normal store I go to and then I fill in at walmart and the local grocery store chain with items these two store don’t have. usually only one or two things.

Making my menu.

I have a running list of 30 meals my family loves. I usually make a menu for a month. I have a few meals that stay the same. We have Monday taco night and Friday pizza night. we also have Saturday morning pancakes and at noon we eat hamburgers. this is a family tradition since we were married. I then fill in all the dinners with the main dishes my family loves. I learned when I was a cook at a camp that people don’t remember the meals they ate 30 days ago. thats why I have 30 meals.

I then have on hand the sides I need. usually I don’t do a starch like potatoes because we no longer eat those. I usually have the main dish and then a veggie. My kids and husband eat corn, peas and cheesy green beans. When I serve peas or corn I usually sub my own veggie. Broccoli or spiraled zucchini.

So start building your menu. Recently I bought a dry erase menu board. It sticks to the outside of my cabinet. I love all kinds of dry erase boards. You can find this menu board on amazon here.

https://www.amazon.com/Dry-Erase-Meal-Planner-Calendar/dp/B01EW48T2K/ref=as_sl_pc_tf_til?tag=makingimperfe-20&linkCode=w00&linkId=1f51ff4710bb4f227aee0ccc4e8f76d3&creativeASIN=B01EW48T2K

I usually feed my kids cereal or bread toast and jam for breakfast and our lunches are sandwiches or easy quick meals that I always have those items on hand.

From here I make my shopping list. I look what I have on hand and what I might need for the recipes. You can multiply this for several weeks if you would rather go once every two weeks or once a month.  I also have a running list on a dry erase board on my refrigerator. This helps if I ran out of something I always have on hand.

A secret I learned: You can write on a dry erase board with sharpie and then remove it with nail polish remover. This makes it so nothing on my boards can be erased. (stay tuned for explanations about my organization boards for cleaning, schedules and activities.) Here are a few links to these things I’ve mentioned.

A dry erase board

http://<iframe style=”width:120px;height:240px;” marginwidth=”0″ marginheight=”0″ scrolling=”no” frameborder=”0″ src=”//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=tf_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=makingimperfe-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B000Q33LNO&asins=B000Q33LNO&linkId=90c21ea44fd07ac040d07f17948304a6&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=false&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff”> </iframe>

A package of multi colored sharpies.

http://<iframe style=”width:120px;height:240px;” marginwidth=”0″ marginheight=”0″ scrolling=”no” frameborder=”0″ src=”//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&OneJS=1&Operation=GetAdHtml&MarketPlace=US&source=ac&ref=tf_til&ad_type=product_link&tracking_id=makingimperfe-20&marketplace=amazon&region=US&placement=B019QBPDSM&asins=B019QBPDSM&linkId=e6a14d15e9f2595d1915172eae45c4d4&show_border=false&link_opens_in_new_window=false&price_color=333333&title_color=0066c0&bg_color=ffffff”> </iframe>

Grocery shopping:

On my grocery trip I usually plan to make three stops. I load up my cooler bags and thirty one bags and off I go. Usually I have two kids in tow. I plan to go to Costco around lunch time for the awesome taste tests and they have super cheap pizza and also I get their huge ceaser salad. I then conquer the stores. With little ones I like loading the groceries right into the bags in the back of the car. I can buckle in the kids and hand them a snack before I start so they aren’t running around aldi stressing me out. Sometimes the weather doesn’t allow this but thats what I hope for.

I hope this has inspired you to make a plan I know it sure has inspired me to get at it again. Sometimes I don’t always follow this strategy. Life gets busy and I get out of the menu planning stages. But it sure does help me when I do it. Now I am going off to make my menu and grocery list for the next time I go to town.

Signing off from one woman to another.

Jenny Ren

If you want to get one of the items I have linked here it benefits me if you buy right from amazon when you click from my website. Win Win because I get a little profit from your purchase and you get products I already have tried out for you! Thanks for shopping too.

Six years ago, as a family we began our journey to healthy living. My husband A began having seizures the weekend my dad passed away. I didn’t know it was exactly this until he had another one a year and a half later and he continued to have 6 through the next three days. This pushed us into going to a naturalist Doctor and seeking natural healing. The doctor told A that he needed to go gluten free. Six years ago “gluten free” was a fairly new concept. There weren’t a lot of options that actually tasted good in the store. This news sent me reeling for help. I was confused and not sure even where to start. I got some advise from my cousin who was gluten free, that I needed to get a cookbook called  “The Gluten free bible”. This really helped me to figure out how to actually change my current cooking into gluten free things without changing what was actually on the menu.

As I worked my way through changing our eating to gluten free I also was dealing with my sick husband. He was taking seizure meds which suppress his emotions. He was changing (The meds were changing him).  I also had two little rambunctious boys. I was exhausted and didn’t know what to do. I was experiencing depression from dealing with my dads death. It was still fresh and I was still working through it all. Finally things settled into a normal routine of cooking that way. Some of my favorites were homemade cinnamon rolls, meatloaf (made with oats), and apple crisp. I ordered bread flour in fifty pound bags to get it at a cheaper price. Eating gluten free is not cheap. The flour was from Better Batter. I don’t know if they even still exist. Things for gluten free eating have changed so much. We now get loafs of bread from costco along with a gluten free flour mix and delicious gluten free pizza.  You can pick up gluten free pasta at the grocery store and most of them carry bread and pizza and many other gluten free options. Its as easy as walking into the store and picking it up now.

About a year later I heard about this eating plan called Trim Healthy Mama (THM). I was so tired I couldn’t even begin to think about it. Then I started seeing the results of several people I knew and became interested. I read the book and decided to start in January 2014. My third son was 6 months old and I was at my heaviest. It was time for a change. Almost all of the recipes are gluten free and if they weren’t I could change them to make them fit A’s diet while I could still eat what was on the plan.

I dove in and lost about 25 lbs in the first two months. THM is a lifestyle change. I recommend reading their book, you can get it here.

https://www.amazon.com/Trim-Healthy-Mama-Plan-Easy-Does-/dp/1101902639/ref=as_sl_pc_tf_til?tag=makingimperfe-20&linkCode=w00&linkId=bf0cc95162bb5b7aabb757c86d739c06&creativeASIN=1101902639

This is their second revised book. the first book was over 400 pages filled with recipes and tips along with the way of starting this plan.

I would also recommend their cook books

This has tons of quick and easy recipes for families or singles.  I would also recommend their second cookbook.

https://www.amazon.com/Trim-Healthy-Mamas-Table-Delicious/dp/0804189986/ref=as_sl_pc_tf_til?tag=makingimperfe-20&linkCode=w00&linkId=133b69a409da3a902fb418f30ca2097b&creativeASIN=0804189986

These are all vital to beginning this journey. But if you can only get one cookbook go with this next one.

This cook book I use almost daily, its by another girl who has had great success with THM. She has a website and now printed this cookbook. Brianna Thomas has a style of cooking that is very home style and traditional. All these things are on the plan. Her style is similar to mine and my family and I have fallen in love with tons of her recipes. Like chicken Alfredo, pineapple chicken, and lasagna bake.  We love her desserts too like lemon bars, blueberry custard bars and hot fudge cake. Just to name a few 😉

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0998089508/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=0998089508&linkCode=as2&tag=makingimperfe-20&linkId=3496de4fb1526d4f95be52103741a453

After I lost the first 25 lbs and started feeling so much better. My back stopped hurting, I had more energy and stopped taking an afternoon nap all together. I am not very good at explaining everything and I don’t want to explain something wrong so I am sending you to these books for further information.

Throughout life things work and sometimes they don’t. For the last year we have struggled with some issues as well as a few things that have thrown wrenches in my road of life I am walking. I have not always been faithful at doing the THM plan but when I do do it I feel much better.  I hope I can encourage you to make a change in your life if you feel like this is something that would work for you go for it. There is no better time than now to start your new journey.

Make a comment if this is helpful to you and you want to hear more about how I do this plan.

Signing off from one woman to another

Jenny Ren

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The links above are for your benefit but they also benefit me. If you click on the links and buy these products I receive a little bit of the profit. This is a win win. You get suggested products and I receive a little profit. Thanks

P.S. I am sorry for the long links. I am working on figuring out how to shorten them lol