Painting to Heal

Over the years I have not had much experience with art. In High school my art teachers criticized my work negatively and gave me bad grades. When I brought it home my mom would be surprised that I had such low self esteem about my work and told me she loved my color choices and how bright the colors were that I always went to.

As I have had children through the years I have realized the importance of having time to myself to regroup. I have been involved in different classes, bible studies, or have used shopping trips as a night away. As a mom we are constantly taking care of our children and husband and even sometimes a lot more than just that. We plan everyone’s activities and make sure everyone is where they need to be on top of keeping a clean house doing all the laundry and cooking healthy well balanced meals. We have huge expectations that we put on ourselves that we expect to live up to.

When thinking about a mom taking time away I always think of flying. When you arrive at your seat and the plane starts moving the flight attendant tells you how to put on your oxygen mask. But she says you must put on your own first and then assist other people around you. This is how I feel about a mom taking time away for herself. You must put on your oxygen mask first so that you can be filled up with “oxygen” for your family. I think so many moms are barely breathing because they have put these expectations on themselves that are unattainable. They go through life gasping for air and not even realizing. If they didn’t force themselves to “do it all” and actually took a break they would be able to breath. We as moms need to put on our own “oxygen” mask first to be able to be there for our family to better assist them. I often tell this to my friends who may be struggle through motherhood. If you don’t take time for yourself you can’t be the best mom you can be for your kids and also give to your husband. You will be running on empty.

My mom was always an amazing artist and the best encouragement for my art work I have had. She was an inspiration for me and many other people. Before she passed away I had the privilege of having her stay with us for two weeks. During this time we visited one of my friends who is also an artist. My mom taught us how to do the cutest little bird with watercolors (one of the hardest mediums). She made it look very easy and mine was less than adorable like hers. It looked more like my child did it. But my mom said it looked great.

After she returned home and before her death my friend and I decided we should take an art class because we both enjoyed our time with my mom so much. We were so inspired by her. I don’t think there was anyone who wasn’t inspired by my mom in some way. She was very encouraging. She would paint with all her grandchildren and just loved all there work giving them tips but never criticizing their work. She also inspired me not just to paint more but to be a better mom, to not take my kids weaknesses and strength for granted. She looked at the good in those around her especially the less fortunate. She was a very incredible woman, excepting of everyone yet living strong for God.

Over the last few months sometimes I thought oh I don’t have time for an art class maybe I shouldn’t take one. But my mom inspired me to take chances and do things that I am not the best at to practice and become better. As I went through my moms death I kept thinking about this art class I would be taking and I really began wanting to do it more to heal. So this class is in memory of my mom and to help me heal from her loss.

Tuesday we had our first class. Though I was nervous I was very excited. Abstract art is not my specialty though when I do something realist it looks like my child did it. So when the teacher said you need to think like a 4th grader during his demonstration I thought yep I can do that. So I splattered some bright colors on my canvas and had fun doing so. I like to try realistic stuff but man its hard and I wasn’t too bad making scribbles on the canvas haha.

During the class the teacher said our paintings looked prehistoric, like cavemen did them (I guess that is a compliment?). He then saw my painting and gave me some criticism and told me to make it a little different. When I had finished he said that if he put all the paintings up that mine would “get the blue ribbon” WHAT?!?!   (There were some very talented artists in that class, even some who had their work in the art center we were at.) Ok, if that wouldn’t make my mom smile at me from heaven I don’t know what would. The best part was I totally didn’t think I did very good at all.

Mom’s, if you have a chance to get away then do it. If you don’t have a chance make a chance. Find a friend who can take your kids or another lady. And do something you don’t think you would ever normally do. Take a chance and try new things. Also if it has been awhile since you have had a moms night out, plan one with your friends. It is so important for all moms and ladies to get out and have some girl time. Put on your own oxygen mask first momma so you can take care of your family!

Signing off from one woman to another

Jenny Ren